Kaede’s Joyous Homebirth: A Rural Homebirth Journey

Our homebirth with Kaede` was difficult to plan.  Firstly, I had to find a willing midwife to travel to Theodore.  This took me months of emails and phone calls.  I’m sure every midwife in Australia and a few from around the globe got the standard, ‘do you travel?’ email from me!  Eventually we found and fell in love with Sonya from Toowoomba.  My husband was instantly at ease with her, a huge relief to me because he’d previously been terribly anti homebirth. 

I knew I was pregnant within days of conceiving Kaede`, as I knew too with our first born, Rhett.  I decided to confirm with a blood test, which showed that it was negative.  It goes to show that a woman’s intuition is always more reliable.  Next pregnancy, I won’t be looking for this medically unnecessary confirmation. My pregnancy flew by, with the usually aches and pains that go with the territory.  I kept saying to my husband that I just felt that Kaede` would come earlier than we expected.  I think most people thought I was just wishful thinking, but I knew somehow that I was right.

Because of the distance between Sonya and me, I decided to do my own antenatal care.  As a newly graduated midwife I was confident, but most importantly I felt in touch with my body and with my baby to know that we were both fine. I met with Sonya three times through the pregnancy, at 5 weeks for a booking visit, at the Australian College of Midwives Conference at around 20 weeks, and at around 34 weeks.  At this final meeting Sonya left oxygen, and suction in the very possible event that she didn’t make the birth on time.  I also saw our local GP Ob a couple of times.  He was more than happy to be backup if needed in the unlikely event that an emergency arose and he was most supportive of my plans to homebirth.  I booked into the local hospital in case of transfer and if the GP was away here in Theodore that meant that there would be no obstetric services in town so if complications did arise, I would have to travel to Biloela, one and a quarter hours away.  So I booked in there also. I was never phased by the distance.

Rhett continued to breastfeed through my pregnancy and now we tandem feed.  I did feel rather used though at times, with everyone wanting or needing my body for one reason or another!! A couple of months prior to labour, Kaede`’s head was well into my pelvis.  It was so uncomfortable.  I admit I was ready for Kaede` to be born, my hips ached something terrible and I hadn’t had a good night’s sleep in months and it hurt to sit and to stand. 

I started preparing my birthing kit with my necessary essentials, aromatherapy, rescue remedy etc.  I asked my husband to set up the birth pool early, about 6 weeks prior to the ‘due date’.  He continued to be puzzled at me for wanting everything done so early.  But knowing he was fighting an uphill battle he blew up the pool in readiness for labour.  In hindsight, I wish now I pushed him to set up the hose fittings too.  Listening to him curse and carry on in labour is not want you need to hear.  Luckily, we can laugh now in hindsight.

As the weeks progressed I also felt my body ripen and a change in myself as though preparing for labour.  The day of the 21st I made the necessary phone calls to my mum, in Yeppoon, a 3 hour drive away and told her that I thought I’d be having a baby tonight.  She thought I was mad because I hadn’t had a show, nor did I have contractions.  She felt that she should wait until I had some positive confirmation before she made the trip in case she missed work needlessly.  I rang Sonya, who was much more understanding and believed that I knew what my body was telling me.  Although she too, decided to wait until something more positive happened.  I rested a bit, cooked dinner (a nice hot curry!), got Rhett to bed nice and early noticing the gently waves of labour starting to surge through my body.  It was warm and welcoming.  I rang up my support team again and they made their respective trips to join me.  I lighted some candles and started my cold air essential oil diffuser. 

I wanted Sonya to make the birth, so in my mind I kept telling my body to labour gently until she arrived.  I waded in the pool watching TV with my husband while he looked through the names book.  I didn’t need it for pain relief at that stage, but a nice pool of water was just too tempting for me not to get in!  We laughed and joked in between contractions.  He kept telling me not to have a baby before Sonya arrived or at least before my mum turned up.  Although I think on some level he had come to an acceptance that a freebirth could well and truly be on the cards, especially since my first labour was only about 6 hours in total. 

As the labour progressed I got in and out of the pool and walked around keeping myself amused.  Leaning my back into the lounge chair and squatting was really helpful with contractions.  I kept telling myself to breath as though the breath is going through my body and out my vagina.  A chant I heard Vicky Chan frequently say when I was a student midwife. The breathing more than anything else helped my body relax and allowed my baby to move down. 

Mum arrived at around 1 am.  She couldn’t wait for it all to happen and wanted me up and walking around the house.  In honestly I really didn’t want to exhaust myself, and I was still waiting for Sonya to arrive.  But the moon was full and bright and there was a nice breeze blowing, and I was really hot.  It was nice, and gee did it crank up those contractions.  So we walked and talked for what seemed like hours to me.  Time really has no meaning when you’re in labour.  I stopped with contractions and leant on mum or on a nearby tree.  Every few laps around the house I stopped for a rest in the birthing pool inside.  This is where I was when Sonya drove in around 2am.  She brought along a lovely student Doula, Genevieve.  I hadn’t met her before and admit that while I wasn’t uncomfortable, it was a little strange having a stranger in the house.  I think I shut off for a while to make polite conversation and ‘felt’ that I should be making her comfortable and welcome. 

At that time I felt claustrophobic and needed to get some air, and gee it was so hot!  I just really needed space to get on with the job and do it myself.  My husband could see this and we went off alone and walked some more.  I kept complaining how hot I was but everyone else was shivering, so I must have been working hard, though I felt it was all a bit easy at this stage.  I felt confident my body knew what it needed to do and I continued to go with the flow of contractions. 

My back really started aching toward sunlight (I couldn’t possibly say what time it was!) as the baby continued to remain posterior.  Sonya gently reminded me to breathe when she saw me holding my breath.  I used my birth ball, sitting on it, leaning over it just looking for that comfortable position.  I was tiring and fast.  I also felt that my body needed to rest before I continued anymore.  I felt stuck and the contractions didn’t feel as effective as they had been.  I told myself to go to sleep and wake up when you’re ready to do the job properly!!.  So I went to bed and slept for about 2 hours, at least I think it was 2 hours.  So did everyone else. 

I woke up and had a lovely shower, washed and blow dried my hair.  Then the contractions started and they were good!  Except for Dan everyone else was still sleeping, so I walked around the house, up and down the stairs, I’m sure my husband thought I was mad.  The back pain continued and increased in severity.  I must have been hitting transition, because I felt I really needed some reassurance.  I went and woke Sonya up and said that I was contracting well but still felt stuck.  I thought she should do a VE.  I am dead against VEs in labour unless really necessary and Sonya knew this.  She took me to my bedroom and felt the baby’s position and listened to the heart rate.  She helped me to do a coccyx lift which did help the back pain a lot.  We didn’t do a VE.  The support was what I needed.

I got back into the pool for a while and bounced around in there.  The warmness helped but at the time it didn’t feel like anything was helping.  At this time Sonya made me get out of the pool and go to the toilet to sit and have a few contractions there.  It was transition talking but I remember thinking I don’t want too because it’s going to hurt so much and you’re being mean!  Then the logical side kicked in and said it will open you up, and soon you’ll have a baby.  I sat on the loo and the contractions hurt.  I remember saying “I don’t want to do this anymore!” and I remember Sonya smiling at me and I thought that was strange.  The things that go through your head when you’re in labour!!  I went back to the pool and after the next contraction my waters finally popped, which surprised me because it kind of hurt a little, I’d also forgotten about them and was unprepared for them to rupture at that time. 

I reached down and felt my baby’s head!!  What relief!!  I could feel the ring of fire burning intensely though my body now.  It was welcoming as I could feel more and more of my baby’s head moving down with each contraction.  I asked for hot towels to support my peri as this was happening. They were good, but not nearly hot enough after they went into the water to help too much.  Slowly and gently Kaede` was born into water and I helped her from my body, her little hand born with her head.  Sonya helped out with the bum and legs.  It was the most amazing thing I have ever done in my life. 

Rhett, my son, had been up for a little while by this stage and was excited to wake up to Nanny and a houseful of people, including Sonya’s little girl.  They played outside and watched TV, though I was oblivious to this. When I felt Kaede`’s head Sonya gathered everyone around to watch the birth.  It was so normal having everyone gathered around watching, Rhett was telling me what was happening, “mummy I can see the baby’s head!!”  He still enjoys looking at her birth photos on the computer. These are the photos that Genevieve took for me.  I was so glad she was there, I never got photos of Rhett being born, and I feel I’ve missed out on seeing something really special.  It is nice to go back and look. 

The cord was very short and I couldn’t effectively get Kaede` out of the water onto my belly.  She needed a little oxygen with apgar’s of 7 at 1 and 8 at 5.  But she was fine.  It must have been quite a while later and I finally oped her legs to see if we had a boy or a girl.  I cannot describe what I was feeling at that stage, overwhelming high on hormones, proud, and in love. 

I got out of the pool and decided to cut and clamp the cord as it had finished pulsating some minutes before.  I could then ‘let go’ of the placenta which I felt I couldn’t do with Kaede` still attached and directly underneath me because of the cord being so short.  I needed her a little distance from me to allow the placenta to come out.  Once it was birthed I felt instantly weak and needed to sleep.  While I didn’t have a huge blood loss, with the combination of fatigue as well I was exhausted, the labour was much longer than my first about 12 hours in total.  Although only about 2 hours were really active labour.  Again this is my time in labour so I could be well out here!

I slept and slept that day.  Kaede` didn’t breastfeed much, nor did I have much inclination to feed her, I was too exhausted.  Kaede` slept most of the day too, and kept me awake all that night!!  We had some breastfeeding troubles the first couple of days, but some Bowen therapy soon fixed that and big brother Rhett quickly jumped in to show her how to feed without hurting mum and stating, “because you never hurt mummy’s boo boo’s Kaede`”. 

My afterbirth pains were awful as they were with Rhett.  Actually on both occasions they were worse than labour pains.  Sonya left me some mag phos, which helped me cope!  The next day, Sonya and Genevieve travelled over to Biloela to get some Spatone for me.  This is how dedicated midwives in private practise are.  After being up all night having travelled 4 hours to be with me in labour then to make 2.5 hours round trip just for Spatone.  Could you possibly imagine an obstetrician doing that?  The iron supplement picked me up pretty quickly and the next day after Sonya and Genevieve went home, Mum and I and the kids went off to playgroup.  Imagine their surprise to see me there with a 1 day old baby, just to see the reactions on their faces made it worth going! 

My husband was initially dead against homebirthing, but now seeing how much easier it is, how safe it is and how normal birth is, he’d never encourage me to go to a hospital to birth again.  Birth is a normal physiological event, that women are designed perfectly to do.  I encourage women to honour their bodies and their babies and birth instinctively in the serenity of your home, you’ll never do anything more empowering.

Photos can be seen online at: www.joyousbirth.info/gallery/v/homebirths/

 

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